Can Millennials Evade Toxicity and Stay in a Relationship?
Compared to generations in the past, millennials are more strategic when it comes to choosing their partners. Social media acts as a forum where information on navigating adult life can be shared to avoid other people from making the same mistakes. However, this also means that there is added pressure on younger individuals to make the right choices. As a result, even when they are in loving relationships, self-doubt can lead to unnecessary anxiety and possibly cause the relationship to fail.
In contrast, couples in the past seem to last longer because of their ability to compromise on certain issues while maintaining their personal values. Commemorating a relationship through engraved silicone rings might have also helped sustain a commitment for either partner because it turns an abstract emotion of love into a physical item that can remind them wherever they go. But, considering the difference in priorities of millennials today to the boomers of the past, is it still possible for young people to have a long-lasting relationship?
Self-Preservation Versus Commitment
Heartbreaks can take an emotional toll on either end while creating a negative experience. Regardless of the cause, it can lead to a negatively reinforced experience. Similar to rats in the B.F. Skinner’s famous experiment on operational conditioning, people eventually try their best to avoid going through horrible relationships while others avoid relationships all together.
There is a constant struggle between self-preservation and the desire to not be lonely. Most want to protect themselves from heartbreak and emotional manipulation, or maybe even the stress and anxiety brought about by any relationship. At the same time, when someone is in a relationship, they tend to have doubts whether it’s the right one for them.
People look out for “red flags” or signs that they should not be with that person. This leads to tension and can hurt both parties. One of them will never feel secure with their partner, and the other will feel the pressure of having to prove their loyalty.
Career as a Priority
Millennials who aim to reach their dream job in their lifetimes might find it difficult to connect with other people. After all, focusing on your career will require time and attention. It can lead to a conflict of interest scenario between your desire to have a career and a relationship at the same time. Work-life balance is a lot harder for ambitious, young people who have no job security but are still looking to make an impact on the world.
Work may also lead to relocation. When couples undergo long distance, it is like a pressure test on their relationship to see if they can last under challenging conditions of blind trust and the lack of physical presence. Unless they are digital nomads, millennials might have to choose between love and their career at some point in their life to prevent going through trust issues with their partner.
Financial Compatibility
Since millennials are more strategic when deciding on their partner, their finances may also play a role in the success of their relationship. Financial compatibility is when people in a relationship have emotional and fiscal capabilities of taking care of themselves and do not might looking after their partner. It is personal financial security that is extended to their partner. They are willing to open up about money concerns with their partner and can openly communicate their money-related desires.
Incompatibility can lead to tension among both partners. An example of this might be someone who has a job living with their partner who does not. By putting the pressure on the employed partner to pay for both of their living expenses, it could lead to an emotional and financial toll on everyone in the relationship. Another example would be an inability to open up regarding your finances with your partner who speaks freely about their own. This can lead to trust issues and boundary concerns on either side of the relationship.
Even though young people today tend to be more certain about their ideal partner, it can be challenging for them to sustain a relationship in the long term if they are on the constant lookout for red flags. It leaves little emotional room to enjoy their experience with another person who is also looking for someone to be with. A strong personality that never settles for less may be ideal, but it also ignores the fact that people are still learning as they grow and tend to make mistakes about their relationships and their partners.
